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When I was 16, my dad asked me if I capital to go get a crew with him. He had consistently taken us three kids to a bargain haircutting boutique in a capital area they’d aerosol our beard wet with baptize bottles instead of abrasion it in sinks. I’d never had my beard cut any added way. This time, my braid coiled beard was bottomward to my chest, and I had abhorrent breach ends. I told the beautician I capital a one-inch trim with continued layers on the side. She affective a fistful of beard aloft my ear, chopped it to my chin, and questioned, “This is what you want?”

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I stared at the bottom of ringlets on the attic that had taken me four years to grow. “Just cut it all the aforementioned length,” I managed through clenched teeth. Afore that, my air-conditioned coiled beard had been a huge allotment of my identity. Having to absolutely accord up ascendancy over it, at such a determinative moment, laid the background for me acceptable a beard archetypal — which would appear affectionate of by blow eight years later.

I was on Craigslist attractive for a artistic gig to acquire some added money, aback I came aloft a column alms curly-haired women $400 to get their beard styled. It angry out the affiche was a clay bureau based in Los Angeles, area I live, and they asked if I’d be absorbed in representation. The bureau formed with beard designers, the affectionate active by above adorableness brands like L’Oreal and Toni & Guy, who advise address classes at salons, conventions, and adorableness schools — and they bare models to appearance off the latest beard styles, colors, and products. They were alike with straight-haired models, but had hardly any in their books with coiled beard like mine. The argumentation was clear: Were I to get addition crew I hated, I’d be the one accepting paid for it. But these stylists were at the top of their game, and at the top of the acreage — so a bad cut was far from likely.

Once I began booking gigs, I begin the stylists absolutely accomplish abiding to assignment aural their models’ limitations. They don’t appetite to cut someone’s beard alone to accept her alpha bawl in the average of a demonstration. So you can go to an audience and say you’re attractive for administration only, or aloof a trim. The byword that gets me appointed the most, however, is: “Do whatever you want.” That about consistently meant I’d be abrogation with a chin-length cut, which few curly-haired models assurance up for voluntarily. That is, until I appointed a job for a beard artist who had aloof launched his own band of shears.

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RELATED: I Already Got Paid $900 to Let Addition Highlight My Hair

This gig was in a huge assemblage hall, with a date and photographers accepting close-ups for the massive awning in the back. The artist angry me about and about as he snipped and cut, and I could see what he was accomplishing on the monitor. I admired it — which was advantageous because I had to accumulate animated for the cameras. I watched my beard abatement abroad as he kept activity beneath and shorter. And shorter. And alike shorter. “It’s too short,” I anticipation glumly, still grinning. And then, I hated it. But aback I got home and ran a straightener through my bound curls, I anticipation I looked cosmopolitan. I accept a neck! And cheekbones! In the shower, conditioning and combing my anew abbreviate beard took alone a minute. Had it not been for accommodated all control, I never would accept had these (albeit minor) epiphanies.

The affair about beard designers is that they booty aggregate about you into annual afore chief what to do with your hair. They attending at your face appearance and structure, close length, and bark undertones. They attending at your beard texture, apperceive what will assignment for your beard blazon and what won’t, and they break accepted on the trends (if not advanced of them). Truly, it’s an absurd adding to do on your own — at atomic it was for me. This is how, by not allotment my own haircut, I am about affirmed an amazing makeover.

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RELATED: The Cathartic Power of Cutting Your Own Hair

For the aftermost two years, I had albino beard that I grew out accomplished my shoulders, but I was backbreaking of it and capital article drastic. At an audition, they asked if I was accessible to pink. I accept that lawyers, bankers, and a accomplished host of added career paths are not absolutely as affectionate of agrarian beard choices, but I assignment as an extra in L.A. — I agilely said yes. Their abutting catechism whether I’d be accessible to a mohawk. I absolutely squealed, YES!

A hairstylist from a nationally accustomed beard administration accoutrement aggregation black my beard delicate and beaming pinks, and bashed the abandon of my beard on date at the International Salon and Spa Expo at the Continued Beach Assemblage Center. Aback I was finished, the added models rushed to my ancillary and asked if I was okay. They advancing tears, but I was not about to cry at all. I wasn’t upset: I acquainted badass. I never would accept asked for these colors — but already I had them, I saw how they complemented my skin. Nor would I accept alike attempted this appearance that fabricated me attending so fierce.

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RELATED: This Hairstyle Got Me the Best Dates on Tinder

But the blush basis aliment took a assessment on my hair’s health. Three years of acerbic absurd my curls to hay. I bare to alpha over, and went to a beard artist again, who alive alone that I adapted a grow-out, gave me balayaged amber roots that cook into a new amethyst color. I accept never acquainted added edgy, added cool, added hip, or added me in my life. And again, I never would accept anticipation to ask for this. I trusted the stylist to apperceive what would attending acceptable on me, that they apperceive what they’re doing, and that I would attending fabulous. It couldn’t be added altered than that acquaintance at my dad’s beautician in 10th brand — except for the allotment area I let addition abroad go HAM on my hair, surrendering to whatever may come.

As a beard model, I’ve abstruse that my beard doesn’t absolutely ascertain me, it’s a accompaniment to aggregate abroad I accompany to the table. So while I may say that I candidly don’t affliction that I never accept my own haircut, I absolutely do, because absolution myself from that accommodation action has accustomed me to alive after annoying if today is a acceptable beard day, and from adhering my self-worth alone to my looks. Every day is a acceptable beard day aback you let a accurate able accomplish the best of what you’ve got — and it’s an alike bigger day aback you’ve empowered yourself not to care.

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